Early Beginnings - the Bitch Goddess Sermons:
Removal of the Mask & The Widsom of All Futilities

I started this thing with lots of currency
Admiring my own firm booty
And my own pretty eyes and my hot young lips.
I made myself look good and had lots of energy
Until the day came when I was deemed ugly
And they took away my skirt
They took away my shoes and cut my cute hair
They tore off my mask
They shamed me daily with public scrutiny.

I'm pretty sure now all I know is destruction.
Every time I turn my head and stop paying attention,
Blood rises in my cheeks and heats up my heart.
Pagan history shows its head and reassert itself.
The pure instinct of desire starts slobbering
Over an apple or my vagina
I begin choking on seeds and lose all my hair.
I contribute to moral decay and the breakdown of families
I embody spiritual vacuity and think the worst thoughts,
Because I can
Because somebody needs this job
Because someone's got to do it.

I reject all beauty and hate pretty things
I destroy the flower and eat wilted petals.
I burn lipstick and tear up my panties.
I throw away all affections from my mother and father
I eat all their words.
I fabricated meaningful relationships.
I built a family from air and sincere wishes
And then destroyed it for pure pleasure.
I gave my love to the sky and was rejected
Impregnated with air and bloated with hurt
Completely occluded from family inclusion.
All my friends got married and I stayed in the bathroom
Staring at the tiles and the vomit in the toilet.
I stayed up all night and lost my childhood
Prematurely aborted and all cells evaporated.

I left my friends and siblings and went into the desert.
I learned to drink from the sand and eat from the bush.
I was placed at the bottom of the cross and missed all crucifictions.
I took out my tampons and put away my fashions.
My soft cheeks and pouty red lips dried up
And I became pure destruction.
All of this and nothing.
All of this and nothing.